Behind the Scenes with Dr. Eger…

Holocaust Memorial Day, or Yom Hashoa, is a very important day for my grandmother, Dr. Edith Eger. It takes place every year around mid-April or early May… as it correlates with the Jewish calendar. As Edie’s Northstar (her life mission) is to do everything in her power so that the horrors of the Holocaust never happen again, we focus every year on making sure to use this day as a somber reminder of her story. So, when Edie was invited to be on ABC’s News Emmy Award winning show, “Nightline” to discuss how she has been using her platform to inform young people about the Holocaust, we knew it was the right choice for her to join for the episode.

The interview was to be held at the Los Angeles Holocaust Museum, which made sense given the nature of the piece. And so without a second thought, Edie, her daughter Marianne (my mom), and I set out on our trip from San Diego to LA.

Only when we arrived, and were taking the elevator to the interior of the museum, did we realize that this may be a very challenging environment for Edie. As we stepped onto the set, we discovered that the room for the interview was full of images from concentration camps - images from Auschwitz in particular, the main camp where Edie had been imprisoned.

The lovely interviewer, Erielle Reshef, also realizing the potential challenge in using this room, asked Edie if she would be ok to do the interview there.

Edie took a deep breath, looked around at the stark black and white photos in the room, and said, “I will be ok, we can do it here.” We all had a moment of relief, as it would have been a challenge to move the whole production to a place without images from the holocaust… in the holocaust museum! 

And… the interview was beautiful, Edie shared stories and wisdom with Erielle and Montana Tucker, a young social media influencer who is using her platforms to host conversations around the Holocaust and being Jewish.

Dr. Eger and Montana Tucker on set, at the LA Holocaust Museum

During the interview, one thing stood out for all of us - Edie kept coming back to one story in particular. A story that remains central to her life. It was about the moment she arrived in Auschwitz, when Dr. Mengele, the Angel of Death, asked her to tell him if the older woman by her side was her mother or her sister.

She said it was her mother. At which point the guards separated them and sent her mother to the “Showers” which ultimately meant the gas chamber. That story, that memory, and the corresponding emotions, were clearly very present for her while she was surrounded by the images of the camps.

Throughout the interview, it was very clear that she was feeling and working through the pain and sadness of that moment. Rather than be held hostage by that memory, however, she was using it to process her grief and allow it to fuel her ability to bring her message to the world. 

In the interview, she said : 

“These moments from our past, the memories will always stay with us. Sometimes the pain does too. I cannot change the past, but what I can change is how I look at it.”

“If I let that painful moment with Dr. Mengele continue to hold me hostage, he would have accomplished his goal. Instead, I choose to look at my story as an opportunity, to share with the world what happened, so that someone like him can never succeed in bringing this type of hate and harm to the world again.”

Everyone in that room watched as Edie - who was visibly upset when sharing the story - transformed her past experiences from being a source of pain to enlivening her as a source of strength. This moment drove home to me that our trauma never leaves us. And yet, we can learn to hold these moments tenderly in our hearts, not let them hold us back, and begin to use them to give us strength and keep us on our mission.

By the end of the interview, she was ready to do her signature high kick, and bring all of her gusto and enthusiasm for life to the screen!

After the interview, before heading back to San Diego, we stopped by Nate and Al’s in Beverly Hills for a Matzo ball soup and potato latkes. While we sat together waiting for our food to come, I asked Edie if she was ok, and if she wanted to talk about that difficult moment during the interview. After a few moments gazing softly into her matzo ball soup she looked up and said to me (as close as I can paraphrase from that day):

“It took me a long time until I was ready to revisit that moment in my life. Eventually I realized that looking at that story from my past, and returning to Auschwitz as an adult, was the next step on my journey to heal myself and to become a whole person again. I could no longer hide from my past and what happened to me. And I can honor my parents and my boyfriend by doing everything in my power to see to it that something like what happened to me doesn’t happen again, and keeping their stories buried inside of me wasn’t allowing me to do THAT. And so, yes, being in that room today was not easy, and yes it brought up so much for me from my past… But I feel so satisfied that I am able to share my story, so that it can be a powerful reminder about what can happen when good people do bad things. I am still on the path of learning, of discovery. I think I’ll be on it for the rest of my life. And I am now closer to coming to terms with my past. It is truly amazing that the same story that used to hold me hostage, now inspires me to go out every day, and be the very best version of myself. .”

Then, with her signature wry smile, she asked me to pass the apple sauce for the latkes.

Edie at Nate n’ Al’s after finishing a few latkes and rye bread!

Click here to see a behind-the-scenes video I recorded of Edie on set during the filming of ABC Nightline.